I understand the impact of social influence for commercial gain, and I witness social influence at home every day. I have, for a while joked that the future is lost to Gen Z, such is the heavy reliance on social media for learning, socialising and ‘curating their aesthetic’. Before sharing any ‘news’ from Tik Tok, my Gen Z children are required to challenge the claim with at least two alternative, reliable sources.

All eyes on Gen Alpha, I have been saying. They are digital natives, they have been taught to use social media with a measured gaze, they completely understand sustainability and the jeopardy we are in. When my Gen Alpha 10 year old approached me in Boots with a £9 toothpaste she had seen on Tik Tok and ‘needed’, I reviewed my position.

I listened to a radio feature this morning warning about children’s exposure to porn and vaping via smart phones and there is a growing trend of parent influencers, fuelled by academics who, after years of sharing every intimate detail of their personal lives, are declaring they will not let their children have a smart phone or social media till they are 16.

My opinion is that all digital and social media is theirs, not ours. My generation is fearful and learning fast and have a volatile, cautious relationship with the platforms. Our children have to learn faster, they have to learn how to control it, see danger and use it to all of our advantage. Removing it, in my opinion only delays their learning and alienates them from social conversation. Influence and influencer culture has been a significant part of our lives, long before smart phones and social media.

In 2015 we pioneered research for Start-Rite Shoes to understand the impact of parental use of mobile technology in the home on the children. While children were constantly attacked for their use of mobile phones and academics theorised on the harmful effect of screen time, we flipped the lens. The results of our research were so eye-watering that the story reached across the globe. It was a career highlight when Good Morning America used our campaign film in a broadcast. Ever since, I have approached academic theories around children and tech with caution.

My theory is, what if we shift the lens of social media inwards and look at how we can enable children to embrace it in a different way?

So, I was keen to read the report: Influencer Culture in the Digital Age, Resources for and by Girls and Young Women. A report written by Robyn Muir and Emily Setty at the University of Surrey, championed by UKRI eNurture Network*. The report and guidance has been designed to address the opportunities and challenges for girls and young women arising from ‘influencer culture’ online. It is based on primary research conducted with girls and young women.

The aim of the guide is stated as: To support key actors – teachers, other children’s workforce professionals, parents and carers, and girls and young women themselves – to support girls’ and young women’s positive social and emotional development and wellbeing in the digital age, as they navigate the often-times complex and contradictory messages and depictions they encounter and engage with online from influencers.’

The report starts with key findings from qualitative group sessions with the 9-11, 11-13 and 13-15 age groups. It summarises each section, interprets the discussions into identifying the barriers to supporting girls and young women and lays down the principles and recommendations for adults intervening with girls and young women around influencer culture, with concise ‘Instead of this’, ‘Do this’ guidance. It moves onto ideas and suggestions for addressing influencer culture with girls and young women and tackles topics such as ‘making active choices and exercising self-governance online’; ‘monitoring and restricting devices’ and ‘building self-esteem and self-worth’. There is guidance on how adults can encourage children to reach out for help and how to deal with disclosures, with guidance on active listening and learning. With a glossary of terms and plenty more resources to discover, it’s a stimulating and supportive read.

What did the children say?

In the 9-11 age group, I was interested to see that at this young age, they are clearly aware of the influence people online have. They are aware this is a ‘perfect’ image being portrayed, they can spot filters and there is a deeply held view that mostly attractive people are successful on social media. There is no doubt that consuming these images can have a negative effect on a child who is still building her self-worth and an opinion on how they should portray themselves in public to be accepted and liked.

In the 11-13 age group, the focus shifted. Less about how good influencers looked, and more to how their friends and peers behave towards each other. Their social media is there to learn, enjoy and share. It is a personal journey and not something they want to enjoy with their parents. There is caution as to the dynamic of how influencer culture impacts the way girls in this age group treat each other.

Girls aged 13-15 are a step on in terms of managing their enjoyment of social media. They engage more for entertainment, with a more mature approach to self-monitoring and a developed awareness of the commercial imperative of the influencer. However, the threat of how you should look and behave takes a step up too, where peer-to-peer judgement is a threat. Parents and teachers are not deemed as suitable support to navigating this minefield, and it is clear that parents who are restrictive over the platforms are far less likely to have an honest dialogue with their children. 

Overwhelmingly, our children want agency over their social media use and the research encourages adults to be part of collaborative discussion, to keep dialogue in the home, open and honest.

"It was clear that girls and young women want to be supported to exercise agency and self-governance and do not want things always done to or for them by adults." 

There are many important learnings from the guide, such as advising parents to avoid nostalgia about their own childhood when tackling the issues around navigating childhood today. It is well worth your time to read it. The key take outs for me, as a parent to teenage girls included:

1.       Try to legitimise and validate girls and young women and focus on empowering and uplifting girls not trivialising their perspectives and experiences.

2.       Talk collaboratively with the girl about a problem and what she would like to do next and co-identify a solution that would help to keep her safe and well without disconnecting her entirely from her device.

3.       Acknowledge that we continue to live in a mediated and online world, and the girl will need to build not only mediated and online skills for her future, but also for her resilience. Rather than banning her from having a phone or other device, co-identify healthy boundaries you are both happy with to build her confidence and resilience.

*Source:

Muir, R. and Setty, E. (2023) Influencer Culture in the Digital Age: Resources for and by Girls and Young Women Available at: https://influencercultures.wixsite.com/influencerculture